


Without You (I Fade Away)

by TragedyUndertheSky (orphan_account)



Series: The Darkness I Once Knew [2]
Category: Harry Potter - J. K. Rowling
Genre: Graphic Description, Suicide, Suicide Attempt
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-01-01
Updated: 2018-01-01
Packaged: 2019-02-26 02:41:22
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: Major Character Death
Chapters: 1
Words: 665
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/13226445
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/orphan_account/pseuds/TragedyUndertheSky
Summary: This is suicide awareness. This is dark. This is graphic. If you can't handle that please don't read.





	Without You (I Fade Away)

**Author's Note:**

> Yeah, last warning, suicide isn't pretty and Draco pulls a really messy way to go.

Draco hated it. The feeling of the mark prickling under the surface of his skin, mocking him with its presence. He hadn’t wanted to take it but could find no way out of the act. Now he was branded a Death Eater, a villain. Harry couldn’t ever love him again. Draco took the knife and slowly began to carve away his skin under and around the dark mark. The pain was welcome. He embraced it because he deserved it. Deserved the dirty looks and the people who whispered behind his back. Called him a Death Eater and a whore. Since his break up with Harry at the beginning of the year he had slept his way through half the upper years in Slytherin and a quarter of the way through the rest of the house’s upper years. He would only sleep with a person once, they never satisfied him the way that Harry did. He also heard the whispers about how he had slept with the Dark Lord. And while it wasn’t true he felt like it might as well be. He tainted everything he touched, Harry included. His beautiful wonderful Harry who he tossed away so that the other man wouldn’t get hurt; so the Death Eaters wouldn’t use their love for each other to bait a trap. He should have known Harry would run off to that Weasley bint. She fawned all over him and he didn’t have to arrange secret meetings with her so that their images wouldn’t get ruined. The blade was coated in blood, handle included but he continued to carve away at the mark, inch by inch without stopping no matter how the pain made him shake. He knew he should stop, that this act of rebellion might kill him but he didn’t care. The coppery tang filled his senses as tears spilled down his eyes. He was getting lightheaded, the blood loss making him want to sleep. He sliced the flap of skin off and watched it fall to the ground before dropping the knife he’d transfigured out of a quill. Blood was pouring from his arm now, soaking his robes and the floor in a hypnotic way. Dripping from his fingers in big crimson drops. He heard the sound of Moaning Myrtle come out of her toilet but didn’t care. His chest heaved and his whole arm burned in pain but all he could feel was satisfaction. It was gone. For now, he was normal. For now, he was human.

“Oh, you poor boy. I’m so sorry but at least now you can share my toilet.” Myrtle said floating over and Draco wheezed out a small chuckle. He slid down the sinks and to the floor before crawling over to the toilets and locking himself in the one farthest from the door leaving a grizzly trail of blood behind him. It didn’t matter. Cutting off the mark might solve the problem for a few short hours until the skin grew back and the mark would be there mocking him once more. Dying, now that would solve the problem. The Malfoy line would die out solving that problem, Dumbledore wouldn’t die and would probably lead Harry to victory against the Dark and the world would be saved. Harry would probably marry the Weasley girl and have a dozen or so kids and live happily ever after as the poster boy for all that was light and good. And Draco would be another name lost in the history books. Sure, his family would mourn him but no one else would. But it didn’t matter. They all had a role to play in the universe and his was to die in the second-floor girl’s bathroom after cutting the Dark Mark from his body. He accepted his fate and felt a peace he hadn’t felt all year. As his eyes drifted shut he heard the quick pounding of feet entering the bathroom and what might have been his godfather’s frantic voice.


End file.
